God is truly great, if a little crunchy

The Lord is up to his cryptic shenanigans again. A miraculous image of the Virgin Mary has appeared on a potato chip!

http://www.myfoxdc.com/dpp/news/offbeat/likeness-of-virgin-mary-appears-on-potato-chip1264255609382

Indeed, it does look like the virgin mother kneeling in supplication! All hail the wonders of God, who is always making his presence known to us, be it as an image of the virgin on a chip, or on a grilled cheese sandwich or a dog's anus. It is truly miraculous. Unbelievers may scoff and say how odd for a omiscient, omnipotent, omnibenevolant being to make his presence known in such a strange way, as a fuzzy, vague image on a fried potato slice. Surely, they may say, should the Lord of all things wish to make his presence known, he could do something a little less ambiguous, like let's say suddenly unflatten Haiti, even though they had it coming, or appear in person and do some cmputee limb regrowing. And why do these apparitions on foodstuffs always appear to trailerpark dwellers and alcoholics and the feeble-minded?

I don't have an answer to these questions. Perhaps the credulous simpletons of the world need to have a tangible, if ultimately decomposing, sign from on high that He is coming and also loves greasy, overly salted snacks. The Lord moves in mysterious and befuddled ways, like a wino who has overdosed on Sterno.

Sadly, the owner of the Virgin Chip has offered it up for sale on eBay! Surely such a Holy Relic should be preserved for all to see, and pilgrimages made to view and worship its crispy majesty. Perhaps some forward thinking Christian will step up and purchase the morsel and then tour it about the world so that all may witness the slightly blurry artistic hand of the Lord. No price is too small. I would urge the vatican, who excell in hoarding religious relics and who have an unbelievable amount of no soubt well deserved gold at its disposal, to immediately bid whatever it takes to rescue this from potential exploitation and possible consumption.

The evidence is clear. The image speaks for itself. It is clearly an image of the Holy VIrgin, or at a certain angle, a steaming pile of dog excrement.